Create Cohort Blog

Author: Sara Bellum

Cavy-tated
“So, what’s with the guinea pigs?”

Listen. I wasn’t informed that when I turned thirty I would become a lifelong guinea pig caregiver (not an owner, we all know who actually owns who when it comes to these furry potatoes), but I honestly could have anticipated it. I grew up always having a dog or two in our house, as well as a few cats here and there, also an occasional lizard. Ever since I was given a 10 gallon fish tank during the holidays as a kid, the gateway to pocket pets was open for business. Hamsters of every breed, mice, gerbils, etc could be found in my possession.

However, the first guinea pig that I ever had somehow ended up becoming a member of the household the summer after I finished kindergarten… after I had volunteered to pet sit over the holiday break. I’m sure my dad was thrilled.

I also distinctly remember trying to convince my parents when they were house shopping to buy the one that had a guinea pig cage in one of the rooms, an absolute fuzzball.

All of this to say, in my best Marge Simpson impression: I just think they’re neat.

Guinea pigs originate from South American countries like Ecuador, Peru, Bolivia, and the mountainous Andes region. They belong to the Caviidae family which is part of the order Rodentia.

TDLR: Chonk-ass rodents? Yes. From New Guinea, or pigs? No.

Gizmo + Pennywise, a pair of bonded females (“Best Friends”) were the very first two piggies I adopted from a rescue.

Gizmo/Gizzie/Giz-Giz was an American breed, and despite being the dominate one of the two, she had the sweetest temperament. She loved to sit in your lap, cuddle, eat whatever snacks were given to her, and, occasionally piss on whoever was holding her without any warning. Pennywise/Penny was a Teddy breed, and had the appearance of always looking startled. She eventually became a love-bug and appreciated nose scritches with her cuddles.

Shit I learned: Breeds. There are loads of them, so here is a pretty solid list from Oxbow.

Other shit I learned, Habitat Requirements:
1. The minimum cage size requirements for one guinea pig: 7.5 sq ft, or slightly more if possible. For two, three, and/or a haram? Here is some more info on cage size requirements.
2. The first habitat I purchased was the Living world Deluxe , which worked well for Gizmo and Pennywise, and is a great option if a top for the cage is needed. Later on, I purchased a few Midwest Plus habitats, which are decent for having the option of no top, and you can modify the cage to have a ramp, divider-usually used for a “kitchen” area (where they eat and poop), or can be just open. Another popular option is to use C&C grids, usually with coroplast to create your own habitat. You can purchase everything separately, but here are a few examples via Guinea Dad.
3. What NOT to get: Cages that have wire bottoms, any type of tank-they need lots of oxygen to breathe and to prevent URI’s. Rabbit hutches are *sometimes* okay, but be sure to make sure that they are wide enough, no stairs or steep ramps, have good air-flow, etc. (they often don’t meet these requirements).
4. Water bottles and toys: At least one water bottle per pig, some pigs can use bowls-mine have always just flipped them over. A lot of them leak, there are “leak proof” ones that are somewhat better. Be sure to clean them out with a thin bottle/straw brush. There are a lot of toys available at Pet shops, however, a lot of them are not actually fit for piggies. Here is a great list of what to get and not to get. Most of mine are super into beating the shit out of paper towel/toilet paper cardboard rolls. The stick huts have also been a hit in the past. You’ll also want cuddle cups, hidey huts, etc. for them, again, at least one per pig. They will get pissy.
5. Bedding: Fleece that can be wicked (washed enough so that water/piss can run through it) with an absorbent layer under it. I have used simple pads from Amazon, moving blankets, old jeans, whatever works and is washable. You’ll need to spot-clean daily and then a deep clean 2-3x per week or even daily depending on how much poop you are dealing with. I just use white vinegar and water to clean the bottom of the cage and the hidey huts. You can also get paper bedding, just avoid any of the wood shavings or anything scented. It’s bad news bears for them.
Behold: Gizmo and Pennywise, Princesses of Doom.

Odin, aka Odie, aka Chonk-Boi, was the next to join the piggie clan. Unbeknown to me until a few years later, he was %100 blind. He was also an American breed, and he loved his cuddles.

Food facts? Food facts!
1. What can guinea pigs eat? An entire unit of Timothy Hay every 2-8 hours, as well as your face in your sleep if you’re not fast enough at getting them said hay. They also really need hay pellets (Oxbow and Kaytee have solid selections), leafy greens, and basically a cup or so of fresh fruit/veggies per day. They can’t have any seeds or fruit/veggies that might cause them to choke (they really love food, so, these fuckers eat fast). Too much calcium is also not great, so probs not kale on the daily. To make things easier, here is a fantastic list from Vet4lifeUK.
2. GPs should not have ANY treats that contain yogurt, or, look like bird seed. Broccoli and celery should be chopped very very tiny so that they do not choke. Also, despite that they are casually called Raw Food Vegans, they can’t eat your neighbors delicious homemade cashew cheese. No matter how much they scream for it.
3. High sugar natural sugar treats like carrots, cherries (no pits), blueberries, apples etc. should be fed in moderation. I am not in ANY way shape or form to be sponsored by Oxbow, but, they are the OP with treats/hay/etc.
Odin, the most cuddliest bby boi <3

Annabelle was an American guinea pig, who unfortunately had A LOT of health issues. Didn’t change the fact that she was the most adorable, adventure piglet in existence.

Unfortunately, Annabelle did not get along well with Pennywise after Gizmo passed. Guinea pigs are in fact, herd animals, however, not every individual piggie needs to be bonded.

To bond two piglets that have not been previously bonded, there are many steps and options. Here are a few:
1. When attempting to bond guinea pigs, it is best to place their habitats next to each other for a couple of days so that they are used to the scent and sounds of each other. The next step would be to create a floor-space introduction with equal amounts of food/hay piles/water/hidey huts/toys. There will be some chasing, some “rumble strutting” (weird freak ass guinea pig chatter noises), and nipping/humping. All of this is normal, because they are establishing who is the dominant piggie. If there even is one.
2. When does it get bad? If they fight-fight. Not one piglet little head being raised higher than the other, but full-on fighting. If blood is drawn, separate immediately. At this point, be prepared to just have them living in separate habitats.
3. If they don’t eventually become bonded, the best bet is to just keep their habitats close to each other to hear/smell and acknowledge that there is another piggle close by.
4. Single vs groups: Despite what everything on the internet tells you (demands for you to believe) that guinea pigs *need* to have a cage-mate. Not all of them do. Some piggies will never be able to bond right off the rip. Some never bond at all. Some bond, then then one passes and they never want to bond again. Sometimes, one of the bonded pair passes and they can only get along with a baby or elderly cage-mate.
Annabelle, the adventure pig!

Lola was my first introduction to Abyssinian guinea pigs, and, the nickname for this breed “Abby-tude” is %100 correct. The world was Lola’s, I was just living in it.
1. I was gifted Lola through a friend of a friend, and she was five years old when she came to me. I would have NEVER told her this, but, at five, Lola was considered an elderly guinea pig. She needed a little bit of special care, but, would still run circles around my younger piggies. Literally.
2. Older guinea pigs need a little extra TLC. There are joint support treats that I fed Lola once per day and found to be very helpful. Vitamin C treats in case they are unable to get enough of it in their diet in their old age (they can get cranky and refuse everything). Coconut oil is *top tier* for the hairless ones for when their skin needs help with moisturization. Also, older boars can run into impact; soft feces and waste build up in the anal or perineal sac because weak muscles prevent normal elimination. Which leads to having to put a safe oil like coconut on the area, and gently pressing to help release the buildup. Very sad, and gross but not their fault.
3. Young guinea pigs also need a few extras! Alfalfa hay is a great way to get extra calcium and energy to younger (and pregnant!) piggies. Getting them to eat fruits and veggies is very essential at this stage, they will refuse to eat some, but, like most toddlers; keep offering.
Lola, the tiniest and mightiest!

Barnabas came to me via an old coworker. Their child lost interest, the parents did not want to look after him anymore, as happens in a lot of cases of re-homing. Unfortunate? Yes. However, the entire goal of this blog post is to help educate before taking one of these potatoes home.
1. That being said; lets talk about adoption! Most big-chain pet stores will have these little shits, and they will most likely be babies. I prefer to adopt via rescue (or by everyone thinking that I am the crazy guinea pig person of Detroit and just sending them my way) however, I am not %100 against pet stores. A lot of the big chains host pop-up adoption events through local rescues, which to me is pretty cool. I would rather try to give a piggie who is a little older a new home, however, I have had two from pet stores that I could not have imagined not having in my life.
2. Back to Barnabas! This guy came to me looking like a god damn porkchop. He was pretty healthy for the first few years that I had him, then one day I noticed some behavior changes. How to tell if your potato is sick? A lot of sneezing, moisture (snot) coming out of the nose, strange breathing, lack of energy, change in eating habits, discharge in the eyes, to name a few. I won’t get into every illness I have encountered, however, the most important thing to remember is that they are prey animals. They will do everything to hide that they are sick, which is annoying as fuck. However, inspecting their nose/eyes, monitoring eating habits, and routine vet visits are all super fantastic ways of staying on top of things.
Barnabas Teddy Bear Collins! AKA Porkchop.

Uchi and Nagi were my very first experience with skinny (hairless) piggies, and, like every guinea pig I have taken in, I immediately fell in love.
1. “Skinny pigs” (more formally, The House Hippo) might look smol due to their lack of fluffiness, however, their care isn’t much different. They will run cold compared to their hairless brethren, therefore they will eat more…and therefore create more shit for you to clean up.
2. Heat and cold tips for guinea pigs in general: They like the warm, however, they can overheat. In warmer months, frozen water bottles placed in a sock are a great help! Piggies are unable to consume ice as it leads to bloating and can cause health issues. Ceramic tiles in their habitats are great for them to plop on in the warmer months as well. In the colder months; lots of fleece, extra hay, and heating pads are a life saver. How to tell if they are too hot/cold? Behavior changes are key, however, I tend to assume if I or everyone else in the house are hot/cold, the pets probably are too.
Nagi outlived Uchi by a few years, in fact, Nagi was approximately six years old when she passed. She also became my heart-pig. She was with me when I moved into my studio apartment after a series of difficult events, was present when I fell in love with Dave, and went on many adventures with me. She was a fearless guinea pig, never really afraid of other animals, loved, and I mean LOVED her veggies, and would gladly chill in her cuddle cup for hours. Even if it meant holding her little butt out of it so she could piss on our table. Yes, it happened on more than one occasion. Nagi, the most chill yet bravest of piglets.

When Nagi passed, I had a hard time trying to figure out what I wanted to do as far as piggies went. I had already brought home an axolotl- along with a 60 gallon tank, so space was a bit limited. I eventually had the overwhelming need to fill the piggie void in my life, so I convinced Dave to poke our heads into our local Petco. My rule was that if there was just one pig, all alone, we’d take it home.

Anyways, here’s Heimdall. He is a mixed breed, but, %100 pure crackhead. He literally chases the cats, screams for zero reason, likes to parkour on the couch/bed, and has bougie taste in produce. I would die for him.

Heimdall is a solo pig! That might change in the future at some point, however, he seems to be pretty content being an only pig-child.
1. Floor time: so it’s obvious that these chonks need to be chonky to be healthy, however, they do need to move their incredibly short legs around. Having designated floor time can be the best help! I tend to let Heimdall get his zoomies out on the bed/couch, however, having a large floor space clear of anything that they might be able to injure themselves with is a great option. I have used small pens and layers of old blankets in the past. Small, inflatable pools are a great option too.
2. Lap time: Some pigs are more apt for attention, others just aren’t. Having them out, on your lap with a blanket is a great way for them to get used to their hooman’s scent/voice/etc. Also, PIG CUDDLES.
3. Why is this little shit licking me? When they are comfortable with their people, guinea pigs sometimes will try to groom them by licking. Heimdall seems to think that he is grooming when he includes a few nips, however, as mentioned; crackhead. They also will “pancake” during lap time/cuddles, as well as popcorn (younger piggies mostly) when excited, and, it is god damn adorable.
4. Pig noises: there are quite a few of them. Wheeking, which is the loud noises that most folks tend to associate with guinea pigs, is actually just a noise they make for humans aka: anytime they hear the fridge open/a bag crinkle. They will rumble-strut when trying to assert dominance, chitter when annoyed or agitated, and occasionally, they purr. The biggest clue will be their body language: are they annoyed/scared? Probs will be tense and vibrating. Are they content? Calm/cuddles/pancake mode are clear signs.
Heimdall, the Sprocket Tribble. We also occasionally refer to him as Lounge Pants.

Lastly, I wanted to conclude this long-ass blog post about guinea pigs that no one asked for with even more links to cool shit.

There are LOADS of guinea pig advice and help groups on Facebook, however, The Happy Cavy Support Group has always been my favorite. Admins and members give help and support to the best of their knowledge (and quite a few KNOW their shit) without judgment. 10/10 recommend.

I know that these next few will not be of any help to those outside of Detroit/Metro Detroit let alone Michigan, but for the rest of you, here you go!

Exotic Vet Rec: Parkway Small & Exotic Animal Hospital – I have been going to them for years and they are solid. They also provide service doggos and cats! 10/10

Furget us Not is a great rescue for adoption, as well as the Cozy Cavy Guinea Pig Rescue.

And now for some transparency: I had written this post out in its entirety back in February. WordPress, as best as I can explain it, ate the post and it was gone-gone. I spent months creating a layout, trying to find my voice, as well as the motivation to write all of this out again. This is the longest blog post I have ever written, and I almost chucked it several times. However, I have had these little bastards in my life for years, through so many life changes, that there was a lot to unpack. Seeing all of these old photos are extremely emotional, but I wouldn’t change it. I fully believe that I will have guinea pigs in my life for my entire existence, and, hopefully one day I will have the means to do something bigger to help them have amazing lives, and to help humans understand these little creatures.

In the meantime, this extra ass blog post is what I’ve got.

Until next post

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum
August 12, 2026
We bought a zoo! …Membership!

In previous years of this blogger’s existence, there were many terrible life decisions. One of them being a partner who religiously forgot my birthday, which honestly, NBD because I probs only remember mine on account of having to purchase new license plate tags every year. However, in their absolute panic they bought me a zoo membership.

A couple of months later and not only was I no longer in a relationship with said person, I was living alone. I wasn’t new to this existence. Shit (life) is expensive. So, over a period of several months I took anyone who was even vaguely interested to the Detroit Zoo. Thus, a Safe-Space was born.

(Also, behold my hot ass husband and his pet goblin manic pixie dream twink:)

*Fast-forward segway*

Our wonderful friends Carol and Tom volunteer at the Detroit Zoo every Saturday, then come visit us ingrates at Tocororo. They were kind enough to lend us their discount to purchase a zoo membership!

Not only do we get the opportunity to visit one of the most an absolutely fucking amazing place, I get to try to decipher whether or not I can feasibly take care of X,Y,Z exotic animal in our humble abode.

ALSO! I get another opportunity to fuck around with my new camera that I %100 wanna take outback and get pregnant. I JUST learned (on this day specifically) that I can crop photos ON the actual camera! BUT WAIT,THERE’S MORE: it saves a copy of the OG image. Thx, Sony. (Obvs this is not a sponsored post, I just love my new camera boi)

Example A:

Also, also; gratuitous photos of the boi that is %100 coming to steal your gurl.

And now I present to whoever actually reads this crap on toast/the reason I will eventually need jail money: The Red Panda.

If Mariah is reading this, its %100 their fault for introducing me to these majestic motherfuckers. Their literal defense mechanism is basically trying to ask you for “uppies”.

Would you LOOK at that face.

Innocent af.

I feel like this is the part of the blog post where I should be linking a bunch of cool things but the zoo in its entirety is a cool fucking thing.

So anyways, if you are ever in Michigan, I %100 recommend visiting and supporting the Detroit Zoo. (Even tho its actually located in bitch-ass Royal Oak).

Until next post

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

August 4, 2026
Canterbury Village Medieval Faire

“As a Millennial, I am being rebellious in my second coming of WHIMSY!” -Comment on a recent outfit recap I posted on TikTok. I have zero confidence that Millennials are finally getting credit for an actual, super cool trend: Whimsical Aesthetic, however, I am utilizing that comment for the greater good! I fully accept Millennials labeled as cringe, because for the most part, if we gave a shit, we would have done something about it. Instead, there is an entire movement embracing romanticizing the mundane, collecting trinkets, wearing glitter just for the fuck of it, having grown-up sleepovers, and dog walks at midnight with your partner accompanied by a glass of wine (definitely made that one up last night. %100 recommend). It might seem like a far stretch from whoever coined the term “Millennial Gray”, but, I have never actually met anyone who decorated like that. Or, maybe I just hangout with a bunch of kids who like to incorporate as much crap on their walls as possible.

Either way, I am just going to believe that Millennial’s love whimsy (because it’s obviously true).

That being said, Dave and I attended the Canterbury Village Medieval Faire the other weekend, and it was incredibly adorable!

I had never attended a Renfaire Feast, and they held their very first one on their opening weekend. We went, and it was a FEAST. It was held in a god damn castle! A CASTLE. I absolutely ate a number of things that absolutely annihilated my very sensitive digestive tract, but, it was %100 worth. We also were able to chat with friends that we normally see during the Michigan Renaissance Festival, and that was kinda the cherry on top of a very delectable evening.

The next morning, we attended the actual faire. It is a lot smaller than MIRF (the previously mentioned faire), however, incredibly charming and adorable. Privies with flushies?! An indoor pub and shops to shelter from the cold and rain?!! SOLD. I will say that galavanting outdoors in the rain %100 has its special moments at MIRF, however, by then it is typically 1 million degrees and very much welcomed.

Obviously, we spent a few minutes in the pub.

Three generous shots of Irish whiskey, and several “omg, can I pet your dog?!” moments ensued.

There was a tiny Viking setup with little tents and handmade wears, as well as a performance that we only saw half of by the time we walked through it. We didn’t get as many photos as we would have liked because of the rain, and that is probably the only thing I am a little bummed about because the grounds were so cute.

I wasn’t able to document this on the day because rain, but, this is the most god damn adorable witch hat by Seams Witchy. I don’t trust the wind in Detroit, but, would %100 wear this to the beach for an anti-sun hat!

One of the best surprises was discovering that the Washing Well Wenches were performing, and we were able to catch their last show! They are probably one of the very first acts I have ever seen at MIRF, and therefore a staple not only to renfaire, but to my personal experience.

Dave was immediately plucked from the audience, and as anyone can see very much enjoyed himself.

I had every intention of getting this post written and posted before the very last weekend of the Canterbury Renaissance Festival wrapped up for the year, however, *waves into the distance* life.

On a brighter note: Dave and I now have pretty solid schedules again, so, here’s to hoping that some sort of routine will eventually nudge its way into that. We do hope to attend a few other renfaires this year, and I fully intend on doing what I can to document more of the magic these events create.

Also, I think it might be time to create names and backstories for the characters we create for renaissance festivals, cosplays, etc.

I have all sorts of ideas floating around, bring on the whimsy!

(and the $20ish wigs!)

Until next post!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

June 11, 2026
Life Lately
I have had a different post in draft for over a month, but have zero idea on how I want to present it. I have an entire list of ideas for content because I love creating things, and also have a brand-new, sexy ass camera that I fully enjoy playing with, however, time is a very fickle thing.

This spring has been the Spring of Learning: said new camera, (Sony a a7IV, my previous “big” camera was a Cannon Rebel Ti1 that met its inevitable death around a year ago), bartending-with the help of our amazing friends Chance, Ash, and Liz!, and the continuing self-education (aka Duolingo) of French and Spanish. Oh and time-management without an actual set-schedule (as of yet).

Behold: a collection of some of the very first photos I have taken with the new Sony.
1. Molly <3
2. Art
3. Matcha-Cola
4. A wall, I guess
5. The grumpiest cat in existence
6. A window
7. Grilled Pineapple Salad
8. An old heater
9. A favorite corner of our dining room
10. An old-ass car
11. Vegan Golden Kimchi
12. Stairs
13. Tocororo patio at night
14. Poe’s Poems
15. Hibiscus Pomegranate Paloma
Dave and I also spend most of our days off cleaning the disaster we made in our home during the week, at one of our friend’s bar-on our laptops and drinking, at Tocororo-drinking/cooking/cleaning/taking photos/yapping with friends, staying up waaaayyy to late re-watching episodes of Gilmore Girls and doing puzzles, or, sleeping in until 2pm, %100 dead to the world.

The other week, we made the trek out to Port Huron to visit Raven Cafe (Dave had never been!), a cozy game shop, and the biggest antique/consignment shop that I have ever been in. Actually taking most of a day off to hangout (Dave had a meeting that morning), play with my camera, and just not work or clean was the equivalent of getting your favorite pull from a blind box. Yes, I do hate myself for typing that.

There are quite a few projects on the horizon, that range from personal, house/yard, and work. All that are pretty amazing future endeavors!

So stay tuned, and stuff!

Until next post!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum
May 7, 2026
Adventure Time!

What do we have here? Just two tired, puffy-faced idiots who just got back from their very first road trip together! Did we exhaust ourselves? Yes. Was it worth it? %10000.

Dave’s beautiful sister, and my sister-in-law, Emily, got married last Saturday! The wedding was held in Prairie du Chien, Wisconsin, a 9 hour drive from Detroit. Sadly, I have no photos from the drive out due to having my phone replaced. Basically just picture Dave and I stuffing ourselves with delicious tacos and snacks, and me begrudgingly setting up my new iPhone during said 9 hours.

…thanks, Apple.

We arrived late at night on Thursday, and Emily was so very kind and sweet and stayed up to wait for us. Speaking of kind and sweet, meet Thor!

The next morning everyone was up early, and I finally got to meet more of Dave’s family. It was a busy day, and everyone had running around to do before the rehearsal dinner. Dave was asked to officiate the wedding (he was NERVOUS), and since we did not have a million things to do like everyone else, we went exploring!

The first thing Dave took me to see was the Mississippi River! I have been to NOLA a few times, but have only flown over the river. Next, we wandered through the downtown area. Prairie du Chein is a very small, but adorable town. We immediately got coffees from the cutest cafe, Simply Cafe. Dave noticed that they mix their own spices for the dirty chai he ordered me, and it was fucking amazing. We then wandered through the little shops; a thrift store, a vintage shop, a shoe store that had loads of cute boots (I obviously wanted all of them), and made our way to a bar to get food.

We all stayed at the hotel that the wedding was in, and the rehearsal dinner was great, I got to meet so many family members! Dave and I wandered back out after a few drinks with everyone, and ended up at a little bar with live music going on (we are sluts for live music).

The next morning was the start of the big day! Dave was up stupid-early (again, nervous af), going over everything that needed to be done.

As you can imagine (you’ll have to because below are the only photos I took), the wedding was %100 beautiful! I absolutely loved Emily’s dress, the decorations, everything. I feel bad for not taking any photos, but, in my defense I was having a fantastic time with some pretty cool people. There are a few photos on Facebook, by the incredibly talented photographer, Mary Hampton (seriously, she SLAYED). Also, Dave did a fantastic job as the officiant. I love, and am so very proud of him.

Also, also, Oath-binder, Oracle of the Dawn and i cleaned up well.

We headed out early on Sunday morning, and everyone was up at the hotel having coffee and breakfast. I really loved meeting Dave’s family, and I was thankful that we were able to say good-bye to everyone.

Dave and I then headed back to MI, stopping for the night in Grand Rapids to meetup with some friends.

I have been to Grand Rapids a few times, but hadn’t been downtown in a minute. We ended up meeting our friends at Stella’s Lounge, which was really cute! Obviously, we love random-nerd decor, and this place nailed it. The food was pretty good, too! One of the bestest BLTs I have had, and I have consumed MANY.

We then checked into our hotel, and made our way out to peruse the local bars. We ended up spending most of the night at The Apartment Lounge, where they were hosting Showtunes Sunday Karaoke, and it was lit! There are many, many talented singers out there, I am not one of them, so we did not partake but did enjoy! We also made friends, who we then ran into again at The Grand Coney, which is an incredible experience at 3:30am, if you were wondering.

The next morning, we stopped to get caffeine, then headed to Lansing. We were on a mission to find a cool gaming shop, which we did, but not before a legit, accidental side-quest to the mall. Which ended up being a cool experience, because we stumbled across Schuler Books, an independent bookstore, and it was not only huge as hell, but also packed! It was really nice seeing not only a bookstore doing well, but one located in a mall. A what a wonderful, beautiful relic!

The Gaming Cantina was choc-full of all kinds of goodies! We left with two mystery bags; A D&D one for Dave, and a Stranger Things one for myself. We decided to eat our first meal of the day at 3:30pm, at Tavern 109, and to open said mystery bags…and also put together Legos, because I am literally twelve. The bartender was really excited, she likes Legos, so it was nice to meet another twelve year old in the wild.

Because a million hours in the car wasn’t enough, we decided to not take the freeway the rest of the way home, and to instead take Grand River all the way. We stopped once more at New Way Inn, a place that neither Dave or I had been in ages. There have been MANY a drunken nights spent there. Woof.

This was not only our first road trip together, it was also our first real vacation. We haven’t even taken our honeymoon yet, because we are living that entrepreneur life (A.K.A., always busy). So many thank-yous to Emily and Dylan for getting married, on the most beautiful Saturday in February in existence, and for Dave for driving the entire trip. I actually managed to only nod off three times, coloring books came in clutch!

We have a lot of big things coming up, and hopefully I will be able to share about some of them soon. I am forever grateful for this time with Dave, and his wonderful family <3

*I was not paid, nor asked to provide links. I just like supporting the little guys :)

Until next post!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

February 20, 2026
The End Of An Era

“I was grinding my teeth, I was wasting my youth
And using up my teeth
Now I’m done chewing my nails
Hanging my head, chasing my tail
It got so bad I quit my job
Then I got a new job climbing the walls”

-Climbing The Walls, They Might Be Giants, The Else

T.M.B.G. appropriately named their 12th studio album, IMO, The Else. I had always thought that The Else referred to the unknown, or, everything “else”. The Else, (again, IMO) is chockfull of songs with a heavy theme of imposter syndrome. Climbing the Walls being the most relatable to the person behind the keyboard, not to mention it had been stuck in my head constantly throughout the last dregs of this past year.

They also released The Else in 2007, the very same year I started my first of many jobs at Vesco Oil.

I started off very green, I had never worked in an office before. I was also a student, very eager to pay off debt, no longer living at home, and after years of not having insurance, I was elated.

It took me a minute to graduate from community college, and then enter Oakland University, full-time, while also working full-time.

I had also gotten married, bought a house, graduated, got divorced, moved home, moved out, survived a few shitty breakups, was mugged and hospitalized, all over the span of almost 19 years. I worked with four different departments, made friends, made enemies, made some pretty solid memories that will be kept for as long as my geriatric millennial ass can remember them.

I took the time and care to decorate my office and would change things up seasonally. Behold my first big-girl desk and decor:

The offices are attached to the warehouse, making for an interesting setup. It was almost always freezing or hotter than Satan’s armpit. No matter what department I worked for, I trekked out into the warehouse daily. I made friends with a lot of the warehouse employees, mechanics, and drivers.

Over the years, I worked in a variety of different departments: Transportation, Inventory Control, Purchasing, and I assisted in the AP department.

The last leg of my *almost* 19 years was 3.5ish years as a Purchasing assistant. I was hired into the department with the understanding that upper management would be seeing how I fared in Purchasing after so many years in other departments. I received a dollar raise when I entered that department. I was under the belief that after a few months, or at the very least my next performance review, I would be informed if I would be considered to be trained as an actual Buyer (the person I “replaced” was a Buyer, I am not sure what that salary entails, I just knew that It had to be more than whatever I was making at the time).

After a year in Purchasing, I was told that I was a hard worker, I needed improvements because I made mistakes, and that it was noted that I would like to learn more.

After the second year of the same results, I knew that I would never become what they were looking for. I made mistakes, little, stupid mistakes. I was late, often, and although it wasn’t an issue that I just stayed later to work all of my hours, often after many employees left so that I could get work done in peace and quiet, it suddenly became so.

It was known for years that I had bad stomach issues, and, I was finally diagnosed with Microscopic Colitis. I have a steroid that does wonders to help aide the side effects, however, MC is a literal disease. Despite watching what/how much/etc I eat, I have flare-ups. Another cause of flare-ups? Stress.

I had to ask my PC to write me a note, explaining what I had, what the symptoms were, and to describe a flare-up.

A place I had worked for years, watched my co-worker get married, watched another fight for everything when their child was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. Watched two coworkers fall in love, watched everyone be supportive when I went through divorce, breakups, and eloping with the love of my life.

Watched them be supportive as I took workshops, and classes at Grand Valley to pursue a career in Digital Marketing.

Because I had worked there for so long, I had worked with many departments over the years. I had insight to know how changing one procedure in one department would affect another. I knew how to assist the Order Entry department, not because of my knowledge of being in Purchasing, but because I worked in Inventory Control. I knew, and had relationships with, half of our vendors before even moving to Purchasing because of helping with Accounts Payables. That really comes in clutch when you are waiting on credits, need things to be returned, etc.

I was also diagnosed (FINALLY) with ADHD during my time in Purchasing. Adderall aided me greatly, but I also needed to be challenged. I also understand how asking to learn more, while also trying to launch an entirely separate career can look confusing on the outside, but hey, I have that spicy brain that needs challenging input in order to function better.

I also had to build this entire career from scratch, it was going to take time. I also loved the coworkers that I loved. I was also a hard worker. Also, also, I love to learn. Vesco had also not hired a Buyer in the 3.5 years I was in that department. And, when my boss announced his retirement, they didn’t hire a replacement until he had two weeks left until he was %100 gone.

Being as though there were only three people in Purchasing, one buyer, one manager, one assistant, and one person in another facility who can assist, however, had been moved to Operations in another state entirely, maybe some consideration should have been applied?

I asked my immediate boss, I asked our office manager, I asked our company manager, to be trained as a backup for our department, with compensation. I spent six months trying to make this happen, with the support and help from my immediate coworker (the only Buyer Vesco had), the office manager, and mostly, the company manager. I waited.

The HR manager couldn’t come to the phone, why? They fucking quit.

The replacement for my boss was hired, and, while in training, I was completely bombarded and swamped with questions from the sales team and Customer Service, while doing my own daily/weekly/ tasks and duties.

Climbing the Walls was played on repeat in my head, and IRL (do people still use IRL? IDK)

After my old boss left, and my new boss took over, I spent three weeks not only training my new boss on most of the tasks he really needed a month or so being trained on and not a few days, but running the entire packaging side for the entire company, with zero training. I had two choices: either do nothing, or, do something.

I didn’t know how to run the daily report that informed the department of what to order. I did know how big the orders needed to be for each vendor to be placed. I knew which vendors had freight requirements and the min/max to meet them. I knew what vendors were close to our different warehouse locations, therefore what could be picked up by who and placed on a transfer to the location that needed the product.

I also realized that I gave zero fucks about oil. That I should give zero fucks about the way “new management” was handling things (i.e. micromanaging, zero trust in employees, watching moral just swim in the toilet, disliking greatly when you explain that making big changes are amazing but making sure they are executed properly and learning how those changes might affect other departments) I still gave a fuck about my coworkers, my friends. The people I had seen on the daily more than any partner I had been with.

I realized that if a company can get by with not giving you the actual title of what you are doing, they won’t ever pay you more.

And why would they? Why pay me what the actual wage is for a Buyer when I am already doing %99.9 of it for the rate of an assistant?

Enter They Might Be Giants fifteenth studio album,”Join Us”. Most notably, “Can’t Keep Johnny Down”:

“Outnumbered a million to one
All of the dicks in this dick town
Can’t keep Johnny down”

After just shy of 19 years, I put in my two weeks notice.

Did I feel like complete shit abandoning the only other person in Purchasing, and my friend? Yes, and terribly so. Did I have another job lined up? Fuck no. Did I remember that I worked 50+ hours per week, clocking out after 40 so that I wouldn’t get into trouble for having over time and just working for free? Fuck yes.

The last two weeks? I chose me. I saw my hair thinning out, the bags under my eyes from running on four hours of sleep, for not being able to sleep due to stress.

I chose me because I wasn’t chosen by them. Those weeks of running the entire packaging side of the company and training my new boss? I was challenged. I made mistakes, but far less than the ones caused by not being stimulated. I chose me because even though I knew I could do it, and I was capable, I refused to be treated like I wasn’t.

I chose to write this blog post as an exit interview, as I did not receive one.

Why was I asked by many of my Vesco cohorts to stay? To come work in other departments after I put my notice in? To be asked to stay on, at least until I get a new job. I don’t know. Why was I ignored when I asked to be trained? Why were the managers who tried to help me ignored?

Am I just a shitty employee? Considering four head of department managers came to see me after I placed my notice, I doubt it. Am I just fluffing my feathers for not getting a pay raise for the work I put in? Possibly. But, I think proving that I am in fact capable of the tasks and responsibilities I handled takes care of that.

I just wasn’t going to do it at $22 per hour, with zero allowance for OT.

Maybe the need to be constantly learning/stimulated was too weird. Maybe making my office space look like an Ikea apartment was weird. Maybe being the office snack provider so that people didn’t have to spend money on the vending machine was weird. Maybe, the non-binary, not straight, office twink who wore whatever the fuck they wanted (within dress code) was just too fucking weird.

Blah, blah something about not wondering about “The Else” and instead to “Join (you!)”.

I choose me. I chose me. And none of the dicks in that dick job can keep Sara down.

Until next post!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

January 28, 2026
A Photo An Hour (Kinda)

The prompt for this blog post was to take one photo, each hour of the day for twelve hours. The inspiration was to capture these images with Dave’s Canon, with the intent of becoming more familiar with his camera.

Neither intent or purpose made it. I took photos throughout the day with my iPhone, because I have no clue where the Canon decided to hibernate. Also, because I chose Saturday, the day we both are at Tocororo, it was busy as hell and I did not have a spare moment for every hour we were there.

An attempt was made. Behold:

Bright eyed & bushy tailed in Eastern Market, kicking off the workday with fresh flowers for the tables at Tocororo, and loads caffeine.

The market was a little on the empty side, and we nabbed a great parking spot. We therefore assumed that we wouldn’t be a very busy day. We were wrong.

I failed to take a picture an hour, however, I did manage to get some foodie + drink pics for Toco’s socials. A Cajun chicken thigh sammie, which is a new menu item. And rum, because rum bar (also, the box is pretty).

Almost end-of-shift boop w/the Toco kids!

I finished up a little earlier than Dave, so I sat at the bar noodling out some ideas for upcoming posts when a wild Nekita appeared!

Nekita works at Lagerhaus No. 5, a brewery we frequent in the market. She is also a fellow neurodivergent-crafty kid, and one of the besties.

Dave and I then decided to grab a post-work drink at Detroit City Distillery, also located in Eastern Market. They are still decked out for the holidays, so it is festive af in there.

We then headed up to Ferndale to celebrate the birth of another bestie, Aaron! I also failed to take a photo of said kid. Instead, enjoy this photo of Dave, Paige, Dwayne, Nick, et moi.

I have high hopes of doing a series of these posts, hopefully taking photos once per hour and not at random, and with the intent of using all of our cameras. That being said, stay tuned! Hopefully I won’t fuck it up next round!

That’s all folks, see ya next post!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

December 28, 2025
Elmwood Historic Cemetery

“In October any wonderful unexpected thing might be possible.”

– Elizabeth George Speare

A beautiful Sunday off during my absolute favorite, and, simultaneously busiest month of the year? Gallivanting about, dressed like vampires in Detroit’s oldest (and rumored to be haunted, because of course it is) cemetery? On a quintessential, fall as fuck day? How wonderfully unexpected!

Mostly because we had gone out the night before, after working all day, and stayed up way too late like the feral freaks we are.

We had dressed as vampires for Creepy Cheapy, a super-fun Halloween event in Pontiac, MI. It was too dark to take decent photos, and when we finally arrived we found our friends and immediately became complete menaces. Needless to say, we had a good time.

Waking up the next morning and finding the motivation to put our entire costumes back on and document it? Wonderfully unexpected, indeed.

Behold! The Elmwood Historic Cemetery:

Established in 1846, Elmwood Cemetery in Detroit is one of Michigan’s most important historic cemeteries. Located in Detroit’s Eastside Historic Cemetery District, Elmwood is the oldest, continuously operating, non-denominational cemetery in Michigan.

Elmwood is approximately eighty-six(ish) acres, a certified arboretum, and recognized as a significant site for the National Underground Railroad Network to Freedom, by the National Parks Service of the United States Department of the Interior. There are several famous and well-regarded humans buried in Elmwood’s grounds, rumored ghosts, and ghostly markers with interesting history, but most importantly, IMO, it is gorgeous as hell.

The design and layout of the park was created to preserve and enhance the natural land; groves, hills, beautiful trees, vegetation, and, a historic creek: The Bloody Run.

“On July 31, 1763, in an incident during the Pontiac uprising against the British, the creek was renamed Bloody Run after the Native American massacre of Captain Dalzell and his men“. Can’t imagine why it’s claimed to be haunted.

Elmwood Cemetery contains the only part of the creek that is open and visible, and most likely where all the ghosts like to hang.

Many thanks to Frederick Law Olmsted: landscape architect! (RIP)

Dave and I had made plans last October to visit Elmwood, however, our schedules rudely prevented it. I was elated to finally get to see it in all of its glory, although I would like to make a return visit on a gloomy day. You know, for the “mood” and all.

Speaking of, it could have been the beautiful weather, the fun of taking photos, the confusion on the two different tourist groups faces at the sight of a couple of idiots dressed as vampires, but, Elmwood did not feel haunted. I have only ever felt unwelcome at one cemetery, The Ganong Cemetery in Westland, MI. All of the other cemeteries that I have visited have actually felt very calming, and welcoming. Or, my ghost spidey-sense is broken.

Elmwood is also very close to our home, so, we are basically neighbors. I fully plan to make return visits, and I will keep y’all posted on any ghostly happenings.

Until next post, XO

“It’s not a phase, Mom!”

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

November 5, 2025
Halloween Hollow
hol·low /ˈhälō/ adjective
1. having a hole or empty space inside.
The past few years have been full of endings and new beginnings: moving three times, friendship and relationship breakups, etc. Resulting in the loss/damage of most of my Halloween decor. Little remained, but last year I was able acquire a few things for my Dreamtroit Dorm.

Over the years, my aesthetic has changed little-by-little when it comes to decor in general. My old apartment in Ferndale was very hedge-witch/vintage mixed with horror-regardless of the time of year, and after that it was more of a mix of vintage Halloween decor with whatever came along. When I moved into Dreamtroit, I had so very little that it was almost nothing, a hollow.

Obviously, I love blue. So I started with adding a few blue pumpkins mixed in with whatever I had leftover. My parents, and Dave, gifted me two of my most favorite items: a light-up haunted house, and a ceramic pumpkin with an almost folk pattern. Both have remained up all year, because us spooky-nerds have wants and needs.

When Dave and I first started shopping around for Halloween decor for the house, we both ended up really loving the vintage-inspired items we found at Marshalls/Home Goods, etc. So began filling the Halloween hollow.

I took these photos specifically for Halloween, but, you lovely readers also get an unintentional house-tour: spooky edition!

The first set of photos are of the entryway to our home, that is quickly becoming one of my favorite areas of the house. I never used a front door as the main entrance before, I have always lived on corner-lots in houses, or in an apartment. We have a giant tool-chest thing, and my old table set from the dorm as the furniture, and new MCM shelves that Dave installed earlier in the year. Most importantly: the blue typewriter that Dave gifted me last year that was my favorite item to display at Dreamtroit.

Who uses typewriters anyway?

Most of the Día de los Muertos decor was gifted to me over the years from my mom, and they reside in the kitchen-one of the most colorful rooms of the house. Obviously here I only focused on the Halloween decor, but, I will have to do a follow-up post showing off all of the art.

A few of our vintage-esq bois that we picked up are mixed in, which I love because despite the entire house leaning on the eclectic side, this room holds the most variety. And jars. Hi, my name is Sara and I am a jar goblin.

Our dining room is a work-in-progress, but very pretty at the moment. A headless doll prop from a photoshoot a few years back sits on the tinest chair, that I had picked up for a whole dollar. My brother had said that I needed an accent chair in my dorm, but there really wasn’t room in that studio. After acquiring this vintage, children’s chair that can barely hold a pillow, it became my “accent” chair.

My brother was not amused.

My mother gifted us the spooky tablecloth that doesn’t quite fit our table, so I folded it and it makes a nice little layer under the runner. We also have a random end table that was thrown in the corner, and now looks like a spooky-altar of sorts.

At some point I started collecting both wood, and dried florals, and Dave has brought home more (blue ones!!) and they are scattered throughout the dining and living rooms.

My second favorite nook of the house is in the living room: The Record Corner. That Ikea bookshelf has survived six moves, a beast! Dave placed it there and I wasn’t excited about it until we turned it into the *coolest* record/music station.

Surprisingly, that other large shelf does not hold all of our house plants. They breed like rabbits and have taken over. A spider plant actually wrote this blog post.

The living room is Bella’s abode. We just live here.

Last year I had the great idea to put a bunch of cheap bats all over the walls, and despite putting up 834 bats, 835 bats remained. Our bathroom mirror is Pinterest porn, and I am not mad.

Also, Dave got this cute lil blue bubbly boi and he is precious as hell.

The top-tier nook of the house is this little area that became my office/mini-library. It’s also the only “room” that we have painted thus far, and I didn’t pick blue! Instead, I added a million blue items: carpet, curtains, shelves, trinkets, etc.

Nagi also resides in this area, right across from our bedroom door where she can wheek at us whenever she feels the need to demand treats. There are no photos because these were taken prior to her cage being cleaned, and she is a poop miser.

Our bedroom is the only other upstairs room documented, because the spare room and Dave’s office take turns in being fallout rooms. I have had that cheap “Nevermore” banner for years, and I was having a hard time finding a spot for it, until the panel was hung and there is where it lives now.

This room is the one that reminds me the most of my studio at Dreamtroit. Stacks of books, layers of pillows and blankets, using the desk as a vanity, but it’s mostly the shades of blue and the boobs.

Dave picked up some remote candles that were supposed to be used for my birthday decorations, but apparently that day came early because I put them everywhere.

I never thought that I would live in a house again-I didn’t want to deal with the responsibility, and, I have been spoiled by being in walking distance of groceries, bars, coffee, etc. Our home is in one of the coolest little neighborhoods where there’s an abundance of things in walking distance, and, we are a bike ride away from Eastern Market. Dave is also a chef, and therefore he is always fucking cleaning, etc.

I love our home, and creating a cozy-spooky aesthetic for our first Halloween-my favorite holiday-living together has been absolutely amazing.

Until next post, Happy Halloween!

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum
October 16, 2025
Let’s Get Weird

“So what is it that you do?”

A question that I have been asked on more occasions than not, often resulting in myself mumbling about being an ‘aspiring digital creator’.

“Like an influencer?”

Surprisingly enough, I am not affiliated with Weezer, despite the tattoos on my person (yes, plural). Nor am I paid to post content from any of the coffee shops/bars I frequent (Tocororo aside), so no, I am not an influencer. Though I do try my best to post/recommend local and small businesses that I do regard highly, and encourage others to check out.

I stated in the very first Create Cohort blog post what my mission in this creative endeavor is, and it’s %99.9 still very true.

Outfit recap and GRWM reels? Highlights of the books I am reading this year, homemade croutons, Halloween decorations, meticulously curated Spotify playlists, Renaissance festival shenanigans, nerd shit, kissing my partner, Nagi’s inevitable world domination, and of course, editing, editing, editing.

I didn’t start on this journey in the hopes of running ten different social media accounts for others, nor did I expect to be hired as a digital creator for some giant, conglomerate company. Not that I wouldn’t mind having a gig that would pay off my debt, but, I would need 4-85 years experience, as well as being an expert in EVERY single editing program that exists, as well as sacrificing my first-born.

No, this will be done organically. I am constantly learning something new, a better way to tackle a problem, discovering some setting on my camera that I never knew existed. Also, I don’t have any children, so, I am left to my own devices. Which sadly involves fighting with Meta Business Suite, and ever-changing , bullshit algorithms. How do I go about doing this? The same way that I always have: documenting my life.

What better content to use than yourself, your hobbies, your loves, your pet-peeves, etc? No one is a better expert on you than you. Well, that might not always be the case, but, I am a firm believer that it is mostly true. I might have spent the majority of my adult life not knowing what to do with myself, and eating cheeses that I knew would wreck my innards, that doesn’t mean I don’t know how I want to capture an event I enjoyed, how to dress myself comfortably/sexy/as a Gallifreyan, the very specific way I want the kitchen pantry organized-mostly with all of the jars that I have dragon-hoarded. By knowing these aspects of myself, I know how I want to represent myself to the rest of the internet world. I know my voice.

I blame my meticulous tendencies.

It’s weird, but, it works in my favor.

Managing Tocororo’s social media accounts, assisting with events, etc-I have to know Toco’s voice. The owners, the staff, the patrons, the environment, the vibe, all create a voice. There is a story. The regulars know who the twink behind the curtain is, and that is a factor as well.

How does that all workout? The content shared, the captions/phrasing/puns even, the music picked, the angles of the images in the photos, the lighting, the colors in an advertisement, all are emulating what this physical place is-with my own creativity mingled in the mix.

Is it hard? Coming up with content for Toco-no. There’s always something going on, and, a plethora of unused content is stashed away on my phone, Google Drive, old Instagram stories, etc. Coming up with content for myself? Kinda. I have had this exact post in draft for like, two weeks. I went from being the friend that did nothing but get high and rearrange everything in their apartment out of pure boredom, to scheduling most everything I do a week or more ahead of time, to make sure there is that in itself, time. I don’t write out blog posts for the sake of needing something to post, or create TikTok’s/Reels just for the trend-unless it actually makes sense and fits me.

At the end of the day, everything I create has one major requirement: authenticity. That includes having to go back and re-edit blog posts after they have been posted, reading over a misspelled word because I was too hyper-focused on what photos to use is %100 authentic. Spending the last three hours prepping one post for Toco, while noodling out 12+ more with Dave, is also %100 authentic.

Striving to continuously educate myself-be it over a new feature on Instagram, and learning from my mistakes? You get it.

In the meantime, I will continue to, and also encourage anyone else trying to learn by experimenting with what you know. I am 10/10 suggesting playing with yourself-don’t make it weird.

Until next post, xo.

📍Detroit, MI.

Sara Bellum

October 7, 2025